Saturday, March 13, 2010

The waiting game...

For awhile I couldn't stop cleaning. I organized closets, rearranged drawers, and tackled areas of the house that most people will never see. Nesting is a very real, and somewhat scary phenomenon. After that I focused on packing for the hospital. I did not want to pack too much but wanted to make sure that I had all of the necessities (including waterproof mascara, which held up the entire operation for about a week since I had to run out and buy a new tube) so that process took a couple of weeks. The bag now lives in the car and is ready to go. Then I washed every single baby item, even the ones that I'm not sure needed washing, and put things away. The baby room is now completely set up and ready to go. So now... we just wait.

Our due date is still set at March 22nd and we will still be induced this week as I am now officially at 39 weeks. It felt like this week would never get here! Even though we've been anxious, I never really expected to go any earlier than my induction date since kids in this family tend to come late. But now that it's all coming to an end, I can't help but feel mixed emotions. For nine months this little one has been solely in my care. I've felt every bump, every kick, and every roll that sometimes seemed to crush my ribcage. I've talked to my belly, rubbed it constantly, and in some ways it now feels like it's a part of me. And even though I'm ecstatic that I now get to share him with my husband, a part of me doesn't want to share him with anyone else! However, I've spent every night for the past few weeks imagining his sweet face, wondering what he's going to look like and what he's going to grow up to be, and completely overwhelmed by how much love this heart already feels for him. Women always say that it's a love you don't understand until you have your own child, and I'm already beginning to see how true that is. And at some point this week, I will understand it even more. Oh how blessed we truly are!

This will probably be my last post for awhile, or at least until we are home from the hospital with the little one, so please be patient as I am not sure what day that will be. And if any of you know how to fast forward the whole labor part of this deal and magically get this kid out of me without having to go through it, please comment and tell me your secret!

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