Thursday, March 22, 2012

Reflections: Desert Song

This song has been on repeat in my brain for a few weeks now.  The funny thing is, I've heard it more times than I can count and for some reason, I always kind of took it literally.  Which doesn't make much sense really... because who would write a song that is about being in a desert (unless you're on a horse with no name)?  Then the other day I was running, and as a sidenote I have finally begun to enjoy running again (yay!), and I finally heard it the way I was supposed to hear it.  It was like God was trying to break through to me and I finally heard Him.  Loud and clear.

I am not going to go through the whole song (and if you want to see the full lyrics or listen to it you can check out this post), but rather this verse in particular:

"This is my prayer in the harvest
When favor and providence flow
I know I'm filled to be emptied again
The seed I've received I will sow"

You see, lately I've been feeling... well... drained.  And a little bit beat up.  And for some reason, this feeling has made me want to run from God rather than run TO Him like I probably should have been doing.  Part of me is maybe a little miffed with Him because we just had this incredible church launch and are seeing the fruit of our hard work every single day, so why would He let me feel empty?  And then I realized that of course I'm empty... my family just went through a harvest.  We planted our seeds, put in months and months and months of cultivation, poured our love into people, taught folks how to lead and find their purpose, and by the time we launched TurningPoint Church, we literally did not have much left to give.  That is, unless we fill ourselves up again. 

Before moving here, we lived in Small Town, Illinois (as many of my readers know) and corn fields were everywhere.  I loved seeing the tiny sproutlets in the spring, and my favorite time of year was when it was about knee-high, bright green, and waved like grain does in the wind.  Before I knew it, it would be taller than I was, and the green would turn to brown.  And then, almost overnight, it would all be cut down.  Gone.  And those fields would be bare, and sad-looking really.  It was just mud and dirt where all of that green life once was.  But guess what?  In the spring, it happened all over again, but it wasn't on its own.  Nope.  Those farmers were out in the bitter cold in their huge tractors tilling up the soil and planting again.  Those fields needed to be prepared to reap a harvest again.  So what I'm saying is, it's time for me to start preparing myself again, so that I can be of some use and pour out my love and gifts to better the Kingdom.  Once is not enough, and if I sit here in this post-harvest funk too long it won't do anybody any good.  If anything, I need to start getting back into my Bible on a daily basis, listening to sermons and podcasts online, and showing my love for God everyday.  He has more planned for me than just the launch of TurningPoint, and I want to be ready for whatever He has next for me whenever the time comes. 

I am always in awe of my husband for the diligent time he puts into the Word daily.  He gets up early or locks himself in his office for hours at a time, just to read, pray, and research.  But now I realize that if he did not do these things, he would be empty in no time, with nothing to give.  So many people rely on him to offer wisdom, advice, encouragement, and love.  He lives in a harvest everyday, so he knows that he has no choice but to make sure he refuels, prepares that soil again, and sow those seeds so that he can go at it the next day, too.  Now that I've actually experienced a true harvest in my life, I want another one.  And another.  And another.  It's been amazing to be a part of these past few months.  But next time... I will remember to immediately start preparing for the next one rather than finding myself here in this void.  Next time I'll remember to diligently seek Him in that season of giving.

I hope this song spoke to you in some way or opened your eyes to a new truth.  I love this song because we all have these seasons in our lives - the times we're in that dry desert, feeling like we never hear from God; the times we're walking through the fire, when we face trials and pain that we cannot fully understand; the times we walk through the battle, when everything that we think we know and stand firm on comes into question; and yes, those times of harvest when we realize that we were a part of something bigger than ourselves.  And wherever we may find ourselves, we do have to make a conscious effort to praise the God who made us.  It takes work, no matter what season we're in, but it is always oh so worth it. 

So tomorrow I am back at it, diligently filling myself up again with what He wants to say to me, because...
"All of my life
In every season
You are still God
I have a reason to sing
I have a reason to worship"

You can check out Brittany's reflection from The Desert Song here or add your own link below.  Next week's topic is below the link-up:

Brittany picked next week's "assignment" and we will be studying in James chapter 1.  She writes:

"I love the book of James because of its practical application and insight into how we can better bring glory and honor to God through our Faith and Love for HIM!  I'm excited to get back into it by starting in chapter 1. Can't wait to hear what God speaks to you through this study."

On that note, I can't either!  Thanks for sharing (if you chose to do so) or just for stopping by!

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